By: Sydney Thomas
What is everyone’s obsession with numbers? No, I am not talking about the dollar amount in your savings account… I’m talking about clothing sizes.
We are conditioned to freak out about the sizes we wear. Fearing that we are too large or too small to appeal to “attractive” standards, we have all shared the experience of pushing our bodies to some limit in order to conform. I once put myself on a week-long juice cleanse just to “look good” in a formal dress…I mean seriously, why?!
A huge learning curve for me happened when I began helping Jordan expand REVLY. During one of my trips to California, I was able to experience the pre-production fitting process in person (typically, it just involved Jordan frantically calling me when something did not go according to plan). Now that I have sat in on fittings and have seen how clothes are made, I know I can’t get down on myself when something doesn’t fit me right. Everyone has a different bust size and torso length. When something doesn’t fit you, don’t be so hard on yourself. Every style of clothing and brand is different. It is mind boggling how you can be a small in one brand and a large in another. My point is, don’t put so much emphasis on the size label. At this fitting, however, I experienced my own sense of panic.
Jordan asked me if I would try on the samples she had and stand still as she took my measurements. Even though Jordan is one of my best friends, my thoughts raced through my head, fearing she would be silently judging me for the size of my bust and the tape measure around the width of my hips. The next morning, the day of our video shoot, I was put in charge of measuring the other ladies that came to model for us. One of our fabulous #TEAMREVLY models had a body I immediately envied (like, she came in the room and I wanted to silently back away). But envy nonetheless, I was baffled when, after taking down her information, our measurements were undeniably similar. Although she stood three inches taller than me and is noticeably slimmer, we were only half an inch or an inch off in certain places.
This is the crazy part about bodies. While Jordan and I look completely different, we share the same size clothing in almost everything (yes, the idea of sharing closets was one of the first things that came to mind when she asked me to move in). We swap pants, tops, and shoes like nobody is watching. Yet, before I knew that we could do this, her smaller frame and slim body intimidated me. I used to freak out about sharing clothing with friends until I had this “revelation” with Jordan. The fact that my size 8 seemed to be way bigger than my friend’s bodies made me feel giant and left me to dread sharing clothes before a night out (yes, I was one of those girls that would sometimes snip size labels out of a pair of pants). However, as I grow, I keep having to relearn that the sizes on our labels do not matter. How we feel when we wear our clothing is what matters. We cannot compare ourselves to other women, and as I’ve learned recently, even if we do in our own heads, we can be completely off about their body demographics versus our own. I constantly think about how I would kill for Jordan’s body, even though I am writing this blog while wearing a pair of her jean shorts. Everyone always wants to be something different. Does anyone else see the ridiculousness of that?!
Confidence comes completely from within and if we keep allowing ourselves to become distracted by something as unimportant as the number on a tag, we will never achieve mind or body satisfaction. The reality is, the ways in which we perceive ourselves in the mirror are vastly different from the ways in which our peers perceive us. Even when I am feeling my most confident, I catch myself in moments of comparing myself to the other women around me or being embarrassed if something doesn’t fit properly in a dressing room. But at the end of the day, we just need to feel comfortable in our own skin and do what works for our bodies.
Nobody else’s size should matter to you. Feel comfortable in your own skin, be happy with yourself, and rock what you freakin’ got.